a vignette.
the warm water hits the back of my calves, sending a wave of heat throughout my body, like somehow it is capable of changing everything that I am…
patiently, I wait for the water to rise enough to cover up all of my belly, and in this moment, I feel like a small and innocent child again.
I notice that one foot is a bit longer than the other, and realize that if I move my legs apart slightly, I can a achieve a small space for the warm water to fill up between my soft thighs.
ready to feel the tension melt away from my body as the water slowly rises up around me, but the feeling doesn’t come, and I realize that the water isn’t quite warm enough.
delicately, I turn the faucet back on with my toes. Bringing bath water to the perfect temperature isn’t easy. I want it hot, but not hot-hot… definitely not hot enough to break a sweat, forming unwelcome salt on my freshly-washed face.
Buttons, my cat, decides to interrupt my refuge with a request for affection. Her sweet meowing is breaking my concentration, and I look over the tub basin towards her. I feel thankful for her company.
she loves me now, at 9:24am, whilst no one else is here to witness any proof of my existence. her companionship is genuine, and without motive.
and in this moment, I cannot decide if the solitude I feel is utterly terrifying or absolutely freeing… maybe it is both. but I have my palace, and place of solace.
in The Bath.
Missing Wednesdays. 